A Critical Spirit

I have a neighbor I call, Critical-Cathy. If it’s not someone’s yard that isn’t quite right, it’s a trash can left out too long, or too much noise the night before. She greeted me the morning after I had purchased a sporty-looking red Toyota Corolla. “I see you got a new car,” she said with a belittling tone and eyebrows scrunched a little to the left.

“A pre-owned one,” I said, hoping she wouldn’t judge me as extravagant.

“You know, the police pull red cars over more than other one’s. You better be careful.”

I quipped back, “It’s a good thing I don’t go over the speed limit, isn’t it?” Okay, I know I might have stretched the truth a tad bit. But, I felt like responding, “So should I take it back?” But she probably would have said yes, and then what would I have said?

It seems like I run into more critical-Cathys’ now days than in the past. It’s not surprising, everywhere we turn it seems like bad news. The virus continues to lurk without a definitive vaccine. More businesses are closing. The political rhetoric and finger pointing amps up toward the November election. The peaceful and occasionally not so peaceful protests attempt to wake our nation to injustices that have been commonplace for way too long. Meanwhile, people argue as to the best way to bring about positive change. So, it’s not hard to find things to complain about. It’s easy to be critical, to judge others. All you need to do is to look at social media posts and the critical spirit of a nation is in full display. What’s sad is that sometimes its the very people who proudly advertise Jesus as their Savior. They don’t realize their critical spirit can harm their own spiritual well being, not to mention those in their presence.  Three dangers of a critical spirit surface in the Prodigal Son story in Luke 15:25-32.

It’s easy to gravitate to a feel-good story of a wayward son who comes to his senses. A bad kid who repents. But this parable is so much more than that. If you’re a believer, this parable is more about the older son than the younger son. And I’m guessing that you, like me, have more in common with the older son than the younger one.

The older brother was the good guy, moral, hard working, thrifty, and obedient.  He was the one who seemed to be in right relationship with the father, but actually he was yet to be found.  Jesus spoke the parable to the Pharisees, who the older son represented.  Luke specifically gives us the reason for the parable in Luke 15:2. The Pharisees were grumbling about who Jesus was spending time with (the lost). “So, (15:3), he told them a parable.” Actually, Jesus told three parables in a row. The lost sheep, the lost coin and the lost sons. The lost sheep is found, the lost coin is found and the youngest son is found, but Jesus leaves us hanging about the oldest son.

In all three parables, the owners seek after what belongs to them because they each are of great value. In Luke 15:4-7, the owner lost (became separated from) one of his sheep and he looked till he found it. The lost coin (Luke 15:8-10) belongs to the woman who looks everywhere till she finds it. The two sons belong to the father and the parable ends with the Father pleading for the older son to come in. “But he was angry and refused to go in…” (Lk.15:28). Does he come in? Jesus does not give the answer. The hearers (the Pharisees then, you and me now) determine the answer.

Do-You-Have-a-Critical-Spirit

The older son was not just critical of his younger brother. He had already judged his brother and dismissed him. But now, the critical spirit bled over into his relationship with his father. The grace extended by his father exposed the judging and critical spirit already present in the older son. A critical spirit is a form of spiritual rebellion. Although a recipient of God’s favor, the older son chooses to dismiss God’s nature of kindness and grace in his interaction with others. He reveals a heart of self-righteousness and judgmentalism. The parable of the older son warns us to 3 dangers of a critical spirit.

  1. A Critical spirit separates us from our heavenly Father.

This separation is the definition of sin. Missing the mark. Broken fellowship. The state of being separate from. The younger son rebelled by going to a far country rejecting his father’s lifestyle and provisions. The older son rebelled by staying home and inwardly removing himself by assuming the seat of judgment.  The youngest came to himself, repented, and returned home accepting his father’s authority and blessing.  The older son was in the grip of a self-righteous spirit resulting in a critical spirit. He rebelled against his father’s authority and rejected his father’s choice of blessing. The older son had no room to give or receive the father’s love, grace, and mercy.  

  1. A Critical spirit separates us from the meaningful people around us: family, friends, and our church family.

A critical spirit often manifests itself in anger, complaining, holding grudges, harshly judging groups of people and being unwilling to forgive or give a second chance. Have you experienced times where those attitudes were reflected in you?

Take inventory of what you spend time talking about and listening to. Do your conversations tend to focus more on problems than solutions? Conversations that spiral downward to what’s wrong with that person, or those “people?” More fault-finding than encouraging words? When you finish listening to that television show or social media programming, is your spirit uplifted or depressed? Encouraged, or upset?

The knit pickers, the weed pullers don’t inspire, or encourage others to be better.  After a conversation, or, listening to that talk show, or, watching a video online, take your emotional temperature. Are your thoughts positive or negative? Do you feel closer to the Lord, or further away? Resist the urge to be other people’s Holy Spirit.

  1. A Critical spirit separates us from the truth, which God has revealed in the Gospel, the Good News.

In order to justify our self-righteous views and critical spirit, we can twist the good news of the Gospel into religious legalism without even knowing it. We become more known for what we are against than what we are for.

The good news of the gospel is to be life-giving, grace-oriented, and forgiving. How about your words? Would those you’ve talked to this past week describe your conversations as life-giving and grace-oriented?

The older son’s reaction to the grace given by his father towards the younger son exposed his self-righteous motives for doing all the right things, but for the wrong reasons. The older son’s obedience was based on his expectations of getting something in return for his faithfulness. He viewed it more like a contract rather than a relationship. “I do what I’m supposed to do, and father, you owe me.” The father’s generosity to his younger brother fanned the flames of the older son’s critical spirit.

Christians that fall into a similar state of self-righteousness naturally lose their joy of a relationship with God. Their religious acts now become a duty. They often expect compensation from God for their acts of service. They reduce their relationship with God to externals which naturally result in judging others. Externalism now creates a need to point out the faults of those perceived to be beneath them and to judge who deserves God’s condemnation.

nature of God is not critical

A critical spirit leads to a heart of legalism rather than genuine service and faith.  The younger son ends up serving the father from a heart of grace and thankfulness, the older son never comes to that realization. “It was fitting to celebrate and be glad for your brother.” (Luke 15:32). The self-righteous, the critical-spirited, can’t rejoice because their focus is on themselves. No grace for others and sadly, no grace for themselves.

What’s your spirit like in the midst of this global pandemic, social unrest and election year?  Have you experienced God’s grace, love and forgiveness? Has He given you more than you deserve? How do we overcome a critical spirit? I’ve found that when I take time to dwell on His goodness and reflect on His grace, it removes any room for a critical spirit (Ephesians 2:4-9).

If you find yourself a little more negative or critical than you know the Lord would want, let me recommend pulling away for a few minutes of solitude. Open up your Bible and read Ephesians 1:3-14. Circle and repeat out loud with a thankful heart everywhere it lists what is true of you because you are “in Him.” Then, thank God for His grace and forgiveness to you and ask him to help you in-turn to be a dispenser of that same grace to others.

So the next time I see my neighbor, Critical-Cathy, I can choose to return her critical spirit with a similar response, or I can choose to smile and be kind, wishing her a great day. Why? Because there is no room for a critical spirit!

Dirke Johnson has a doctorate in Church Leadership and is a professor for the Ministry Degree program at Palm Beach Atlantic University. He also teaches at Cru’s Institute of Biblical Studies and specializes in Leader Development, creating high performing teams. He has years of experience at ministering in urban cross-cultural and international contexts.

A Virus Worse than COVID

Virtually every news story relates in some way to the effects of COVID-19. The news feels suffocating. The death numbers mount and positive tests accelerate. CNN reported in mid-April that for every positive case, there are thirty-five Americans who have lost their jobs, while many more have been restricted to work from home. No one could have dreamed being denied their most common freedoms. The most unnerving is that we don’t know when this nightmare will end.

It’s not surprising then, that another widespread virus has swept the nation, infecting more than even COVID-19. That virus is named: Worry. Worry comes in multiple strains, with symptoms ranging from low-level to excessive. A positive test for Worry is at best joy-threatening, and at worst, debilitating.  Thankfully, there is an accessible and affordable vaccine.

A Spirit-led Vaccine

The Apostle Paul penned his famous words, “don’t worry about anything” in his letter to the Philippians. His words were in response to a rift between two important members, Euodia and Syntyche, whose conflict threatened the well-being of the Philippi church. Paul’s famous words, however, addressed those who were peripherally impacted by the conflict, because he knew their Spirit-led response would not only help reconcile the two, but it was the immunity boost for each believer’s spiritual and emotional health.

The Lord is at hand; 6 do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:5-7)

We worry when we are anxious or fretful about a situation. Excessive worry causes our body and mind to fixate on “what might happen.” Medical research1 has shown chronic worrying can affect one’s daily life: appetite, relationships, sleep, and job performance are all impacted.

Negative coping often seeks relief in harmful lifestyle habits, such as: overeating, substance addictions, or chronic withdrawal. People with high anxiety have difficulty shaking their worries. When that happens, they may experience actual physical symptoms.

So, while you take precautions to guard against catching COVID-19, what precautions are you taking to guard against worry? It’s not a matter of just not being anxious. We have to replace that natural anxiety with something better.  Paul says you must guard your heart (seat of emotions) and your mind (what you think and dwell on), and he offers a practical prevention plan: prayer and gratitude.

Pray About . . . Everything

Paul says talk to God by prayer. So what should we be talking to God about? Everything. Whatever is a concern to us is a concern to God. There is nothing too small and nothing too large. Even our sinful thoughts should be presented to God as we ask God to redirect our mind and thoughts in the right direction (2 Cor. 10:5-6).

Our emotional and spiritual health is dependent on applying this spirit-led vaccine of prayer. But first let me share two motivations that don’t benefit us when we talk to God:

We don’t pray to impress God. There is nothing we can say or how we say it that will impress God. In fact, Jesus says we are to pray to God like a child. Jesus is the first one to pray saying, “Abba Father.” Abba is Aramaic for a term a little child uses to speak to their daddy. God responds when we speak from our heart and not by the fancy words we choose to use.

We don’t pray to inform God. You can’t tell God a thing He doesn’t already know. So, if we don’t pray to impress or inform God why then do we pray?

 We pray to invite God into our lives. When we pray we experience:

  • Relationship – We become workers together with what God is doing around us and with those things that concern us. He could do it without us, but we could never do it without Him! What a glory that God allows us the privilege of doing itwith Him when we pray!
  • Spiritual Growth – Have you ever prayed and then began asking yourself, why do I want this? Is this a selfish request? What might God want? We develop discipline staying power, and faith when we pray.
  • Dependency – God doesn’t want us to live life independent of Him. He wants us to experience dependency. And when we pray, it’s the greatest expression of dependence (“cast your anxiety on Him who cares for you” – 1 Peter 5:7).

 Thank God . . . in Everything

Paul is not saying that we are thankful for everything that happens to us. Many things happen that God grieves over (Gen. 6:6; Psa. 95:10; Isa. 63:7-10; 53:3-10). This is not our home. Sin has made this world “out of whack.”—both the sin we do, and the sin done to us. Even creation itself was marred by the fall (Romans 8:19-22). Natural disasters, plagues, and disease are part of this worldly order, never to be experienced in the heavenly order. But when we give thanks, God will meet us in our deepest pain and loss.

My father died of a heart attack at age 71. It was a stressful situation and my mother relied on me to handle the family affairs and arrangements. Six months later, my mother had a brain aneurism. For a week she was in the intensive care unit and the doctors were sure she would not make it. On the second day, it hit me. I broke down in tears with the weight of losing my father and now the looming thought of losing my mother—it was too much to bear. Through my tears, I found myself saying…thank you, Lord. Thank you that I am not alone. Thank you for my mother and family. Thank you that you are in control. God miraculously healed my mother. The surgeons sent teams of doctors into see this miracle. Amazingly, she would live 24 more years with no ill effects. She wasn’t healed because I said thank you. But my soul was healed!

Paul reminds us that we can be thankful for the steadfastness of God toward us, despite our circumstances. We are not alone because God is there (Isaiah 41:10). He can strengthen, encourage, and sustain us for what is needed. Even Jesus applied the vaccine of thankfulness in the face of death.

Jesus demonstrated a heart of thankfulness the night that he knew he was going to be betrayed. In front of the betrayer himself, Jesus took the bread and the cup, lifted it high, and gave thanks to the Lord. Knowing what awaited him the next day, how could he do that? Because He knew that He wasn’t alone and that God was bigger than the circumstances he faced.

 COVID-19 is no small matter. But worry only makes matters worse. Just as we guard our physical bodies, we must guard our heart and mind. And when we do, our spirit-led vaccine, the peace of God, will provide the protection that we need. As Jesus says in John 16:33, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”